horrible way to start the blog...

I know, I know.  Not posting for a while, and just in the thick of recruitment, is a horrible way to begin a blog history.

Things have been piling up.

But that's no excuse.

I have many entries, backdated for your pleasure, that should be going up within the week.  Hopefully I can muster up enough energy from sleep-deprivation (remember college?) to get my act together.  Then I can tell you about my interviews, the midterms I had, am having, and will have, and how my weekend is so poorly planned that I might need to start drinking Red Bull (ew).

Until then, I'll get back to my Latin.  And you come back in a few days, y'hear?

a morning chock-full of interviews...

This morning I had two, yes, count them, two! interviews.  It was like a mini-super-day.

The first was for a fairly large, and growing, very famous company, as a human resources representative (ironic, no?).  The second was for a very large, international company who specializes in everything from your Duane Reade dailies to your Oscar-worthy goodies.  The first was at 9:00, the second was at 10:45.  The first went very well, the second went fairly well.  Fas as I can tell as of now.

I'd like to refer back to my advice post on interviews, as it came quite in handy for the first interview.  I went in as I always do, treating this as a conversation that might eventually lead to a job, taking things quite seriously, yet having no nerves walking into the situation.

My interviewer was dressed in a red sweater-set and khakis; I, in a black suit with a fun pink/beige/white striped shirt.  It's more fun than it sounds, really.  Thank you, Daffy's.  I came in and sat down, and we just started talking.  We talked about the weather, New York, California, and the morning crossword, which was either really hard or I was just distracted in the waiting room, what with the barometric pressure rising as each and every new candidate injected their own nervousness into my personal space.

We then proceeded onto the contents of my resume, and those dreams and accomplishments not mentioned there.  I regaled her of stories about times I worked in a team, had conflict, and wonderful (and not so wonderful) products that emerged from toiling away day and night at a project.  

A question that stands out in my mind that she asked me is: "What do you think our next product should be?"  Now this, to me, seems a bit like one of those school projects where companies come in and create a "contest" that involves creating a "mock" advertising campaign for a real product for this company, and the "winner" in the end gets to present their idea in front of executives and have a chance at interviewing (much as I was doing then), but no real guarantee of a job.  What these "contests" really are however, are ways for the company to get new and young ideas without having to pay $50K per year to some entry-level genius from a top-tier school.  What company would turn down free ideas?  Of course, we do it because we feel it's good on our resumes, and it's a good experience.  But when we see our ideas on billboards eight months later and no check in our hands, you realize that you've just been duped.  But I digress.

Then, she asked me this question: "I see here you're a marketing major... what makes you think that skill set would be applicable towards a human resources position?"  Well, there was a question I was hoping I wouldn't be asked.  I took a few seconds and then said, "I think that it's all about marketing.  It's all about understanding people and the things that go on behind their heads.  If you know that, you'll know how to manage conflict, manage motivation, and be better able to understand from multiple directions the issues that arise when in an HR position."

I think I might get a second round.  Let's hope so, then they'll fly me out, put me up, and feed me.  I'll feel like a king.

After the interview was over and I had finished filling out my paperwork, I sat down again to wait for my second interview, which ended up beginning twenty minutes late.  Good thing I had decided to skip class.

I was called in by two people whom I had met before at career fairs and info sessions.  They sat on one side of table, half-smiles, and I sat on the other side of the table, all smiles, but slightly unnerved, because it seemed like they didn't want a lovely conversation.  These guys were serious.

They started rattling off questions, I, answers:

Turn this water bottle into a luxury product.  Describe it.

Which of our products do you like best?

What does the word 'luxury' mean to you?

Why us over the other companies?

Are you willing to learn another language?

Show me how creative you are.

I decided that I would play a hard-ball game equal to theirs, and when it came time for my questions for them, I asked:

What do you dislike most about your job?

Which product do you think doesn't work?

What would you rather be doing?

Do you get tired interviewing people all day?

How many hours a week do you actually work?

Do you feel like you're just a cog in the machine of corporation and that you'll never amount to anything more than face creams, toiletries, and feminine products and that when you die and they have to write on your gravestone some sort of epitaph that you might disgraced up in high holy heaven when it says, "Aaron Samuels, he sold great perfume," when you really would like to change the world with your life, because when you get down to it, what's more aggravating than realizing that your life had no real purpose behind the bottom line of an international earth shaker, despite you not being the one that shook the earth?

Okay, so that last one is a big of an exaggeration.  

That one... didn't go quite as well as the first.  But not nearly as poorly as the one the week before.  

I should hear back within the next two weeks on the both.  So you should be hearing back, too.  Lucky you.  Lucky me.

haiku...

one interview down

not a job i want, practice

hope for the future

interview #1...

I bet you're wondering how the interview went.

I know you've been waiting on the edge of your seat.

You've been wanting to know for the entire day it's taken me to post.

You can say it: you were worried, anxious, nervous for me, and slightly excited as well.  ELB's first on-campus recruitment interview.

Well, I'll tell you how it went:

Pretty well.

I got there early, after leaving my class early, dressed in a nice black suit (thank you, Thailand) and a stripy green shirt (I look good in green), and a fly black tie.  Needless to say, I was pretty pimped out.

I walked up the stairs to our career center and shivered as I sensed the evil of career services seeping through the glass doors.  I walked past the reception desk to the OCR desk and swiped my card, which denied me, entered my ID, which denied me, and finally tried a third time to be accepted.  Career services really needs to work on their infrastructure.  After that, I sat, and I waited.  I pulled out my crossword and I waited.  And waited.  I was a little early, they were a little late, you know how it works.

Jennifer, as she introduced herself, then found me and led me back to Tim, who conducted my interview.

I walked in, shook his hand, did the obligatory introductions, he sat down, I sat down, and he looked at me.  We went over my life's history according to my resume, and I told him about some projects I had done, embellishing only slightly, and definitely dramatizing things to make a good story.  What can I say?  I like a good story.  And then he asked if I had any questions.

That's it?  That was the interview?  I wanted some hard hitting questions.  

What's your greatest weakness?

Tell me about a time you were in a group project and you had a problem.

If a lily pad on a lake doubles in size every minute and at the end of sixty minutes it fills the entire lake, when does it fill one quarter of the lake?

How many ping-pong balls would fit inside a 747 (boy would that be a fun one)?  

None of that??

Well, I was a little disappointed, so I decided to challenge him instead.  You see, the company I interviewed for is sort of a high-class company, and they had just released word that they were contracting to use the product, name, and likeness of a celebrity known for products in lower-class stores starting in fall 2007 for home decor and linens.

So I asked, innocently,"Why would you do that?  Doesn't it devalue your brand?"

I think it caught him off-guard.  I think I saw his pupils dilate.  Quickly, he regained his composure.  "Um... I'm not sure about that.  Let me tell you how it relates to luggage," his specialty.  Unfortunately, home decor and linens relate very little to luggage.

Pretty soon thereafter, I realized that this might not be the best company for me.  Yes, I want an entry level job, but not at the cost of my sanity.  That's why I'm not an investment banker.

After the interview, they had me take a forty-question exam that seemed more like a mini-LSAT than a job screening process.  And, please, they do a screening exam for candidates who will later tell non-sequiturs about luggage to an employee who asked about branded linens?  I don't think so.

interview prep...

I have an interview in just about two hours.  So, not too far after my last advice column, I've decided to give another:

ENTRY LEVEL'S INTERVIEW ADVICE COLUMN

Most people hate interviews.  Most people don't suck at interviews, in my experience, but most people hate interviews.

I like interviews.

Maybe I just like meeting new people, having conversations, talking about myself endlessly (or at least for half an hour to an hour) and having it be socially acceptable, or just the fun of the game.  Any way you slice it, I kind of like interviews.  I'm at ease during them.  I don't get clammy hands.  My voice doesn't quiver, and I can confidently look the interviewer in the eye the whole time.

So I've decided to impart this abilitiy to the World Wide Web.

Here's my secret: it's not really an interview.

The way I see interviews is that they are conversations.  They have my resume and they've found me as a qualifier based on my being on paper.  Knowing my being on paper, that's a huge step in and of itself.  So what the interview really is is an assessment to see if they would like to work with someone like you.  They want to know if they can get beers with you after work (or during... whenever).  

And you want to know the same thing.  If the person interviewing you is a loser with no social skills and a skewed sense of the world of which you would not like to be a part, chances are you won't be too happy at the company.  I know that's not an objective for many people (money is), but for many others it is (and for those who it isn't, start thinking about your own happiness--it's kind of important).

So really, the way I look at interviews is the same way I look at conversations.  I act like I'm getting together with a new friend.  Talk about the news, talk about how your experiences coincide with the other party's, discuss things that aren't even on the topic of the job.  If you show you're an interesting person, they'll want you.  And if you're looking at it like a conversation, you're bound to be less nervous.

Unless you have serious social problems.  In which case, I can't help you, but I hear prozac can.

And, once again, if you have any questions or comments, please leave them or e-mail to entrylevelblog@gmail.com.  I don't charge for my consultations!!

resume workshop...

Tonight at school I had an obligation via a group of mine to attend and help out at a resume workshop.  I'm pretty sure all schools that have professional aspirations hold them from different groups on campus.  Anyway, this time was our turn.

And let me just say: most people's resumes suck.

Now, I'm not in HR, I don't have a job, and I'm not a career coach, but I'm critical, and I know ugly when I see it.  And these resumes?  They was ugly.

I've been told that I should put some advice-like posts in my blog so I'm not just entertaining (I hope), but also helpful.  I like being helpful, and I can't stand ugly resumes.  So here I am to give you...

ENTRY LEVEL'S RESUME ADVICE COLUMN

I'm going to get this out in the open: do not use a Microsoft Word template.  It shows lack of creativity, lack of dedication to the resume process, and that will warrant itself to translate to lack of creativity, dedication, and competence on the job.  If you're not creative enough to make your own resume, then maybe you would be better fit to fill out a job application at your local McDonald's.  I don't think you need to submit a hard resume for that.

HEADING

So, let's begin at the top.  Put your name, for god's sakes.  And make it big.  

Put your address under your name, but not so big.  And if your current address isn't your permanent address, put your permanent as well.  Then you don't need to go through the beauaucracy of "Oh, but I thought this was your place of residence," and you sounding unprofessional by going, "Yeah well, that was my dorm because I'm still in college, so I'm changing it every semester.  You're just going to have to deal with updating your records everytime I decide I want to move."  Also, if, say, your permanent address (where you vote and pay taxes) is in California and you're currently located in New York, it shows greater experience of inter-state citizenship and the fact that you're flexible about geographical living arrangements.

Also, put your phone number (the one they'll most likely be able to reach you at: your cell phone) and your e-mail.  The proviso for the e-mail address is that you shouldn't put XxCuTiEpiE854735xX, or any other lame-ass e-mail address you've had since the sixth grade when AOL was the coolest thing and IMing was a good way to bypass the fact that your parents would only let you talk to that cute girl you had a crush on on the phone for a certain amount of time per day.  Put something professional.  Educational institutions are always a good bet.  Also, anything involving your first name and/or last name is good.  Numbers, strange capitalization patterns, nicknames, and seemingly random symbols are not good.  I know this may come as a shock to some.

After that, we get to the meat of the resume: your life's history.

EDUCATION

If you're still in school, or just graduated (think three-ish months "just graduated"), put your education section first.  And yes, these should be sections, with clear headings and separators.  Put any educational institutions in reverse chronological order.  That means put the most recently attended at the top.  Indicate dates attended, location of the school, field(s) studied, and degree obtained.  Some people say it's good to have GPA and accolades, but I'm not too keen on that fact.  Maybe it's because I don't have a good GPA or any awards... but more often than not I've heard it's unecessary unless requested.

Unless you are a freshman or sophomore in college, do not put your high school.  Yeah, yeah, you did international baccalaureate, you were a part of the key club, and you had a 4.5 inflated GPA with star track and field.  So you were great when you were a teenager.  You should have translated that greatness into college and not spent all your time hungover playing Super Smash Brothers, then you might still be impressive.  In short, after sophomore year in college, nobody cares, and you should have moved on to better and greater things than high school.  If you haven't, they probably don't want you.  It's a harsh world out there.

EXPERIENCE

After education, you should show your relevant professional experience.  Note that "relevant" and "professional" means that if you worked for Abercrombie & Fitch in the past as a "sales representative" (i.e. model who sells clothes, but really just stands at the doorway with their shirts off, you know what I'm talking about), it's probably not the best idea to put that on your resume if you're applying for a job at say, the NAACP or ACLU.  They might not think too fondly of that experience.  

This relevant professional experience should go in reverse chronological order, as well.  If there happens to be a job that overlaps, put the most important/relevant one first, and the less important one after.  As always, put the dates you were in the position, the title of the position itself, the employer, and the employer's location.  As well, and this is quite important, underneath each write two to three bullet points about what exactly you did while in the position.  Do not write a novel.  Do not leave something unexplained.  Be specific.  Be succinct.

OTHER

After your experiences section, you should have a place for the bits and pieces that don't really fit anywhere else.  On my resume are computer proficiencies, language proficiencies, extracurricular activities, board memberships, and interests.  You can put awards here, you can put special skills here, and just any other things that don't really fit the realm of education or work experience.  The trick is that for any position you held or award you won, write when it happened.  And as for proficiency in language or technology: don't lie, and be specific.  If you can read, speak, and understand French, but can't write it, don't say you're fluent.  It'll get you in trouble.

And here are some other things that I'd like to mention in my "other" section of this advice blog:

- Don't use font below 10 pt.  It looks cluttered and ugly.

- Don't use margins smaller than .5".  It looks cluttered and ugly.

- Just don't make your resume cluttered and ugly.  If you personally don't think it's pretty, a recruiter or HR professional probably won't think it's pretty.  They won't think you're pretty.  And you'll get rejected.  Some tips for clearing the resume and making it nice looking are: columns, headings, bold when necessary, italics when necessary, and serif & sans-serif font for specific purposes (i.e. headings)

- Don't lie.  I feel like it should be mentioned twice.

- "References upon request" is not necessary, nor are references directly on your resume.  If you cannot procure references upon request, you won't get the job; it's implied.

That's all I can think of right now as far as resume advice goes.  That, and I need to start preparing for my interview tomorrow.  Don't be like me; don't leave it to the last minute.

If you have any questions or comments, or would like someone to anonymously look over your essay, leave a comment or send an email to entrylevelblog@gmail.com.  It doesn't get any more anonymous than that.

on vacation...

I should have posted earlier, but I'm going to be off for a day or two more.  I have a friend in town this weekend.  I know all you dying fans (all one of you?) are waiting on the edge of your seat for more... let me assure you it is coming, and worth the wait, I hope.

breakthrough...!!

NEWS ALERT!  NEWS ALERT!!

I have an interview!

In fact, I have three.  Glory, glory, hallelujah.  Despite our differences, on-campus recruitment and I have made a breakthrough in our relationship, and it feels pretty good.  Do I still hate our OCS?  Yes, but they have some redeeming qualities.  It's like that friend that gets annoying if you hang out with them for more than three hours.  "Small-dose friends," I call them.  And that's exactly what OCS is.

The point is that we have some headway.  I've already lamented about the diappointment of the words "not invited," but I have just experienced the elation of the words "invited," and the pleasure in scheduling not one, not two, but three interview times for three companies that I might sort-of one day perhaps depends-how-desperate-I-am consider working for when I graduate.

Anyway, I have one Wednesday the 10th and two on Monday the 15th.  The down side?  I have to wear a suit.  Small price to pay, I say.

first night spent at school...

Tonight was the first night I spent at school this semester past midnight. My first thought wasn't, "Wow, that sucks," but rather, "Wow, it's so late in the semester for this to be just starting."

Quite often last semester, I was at school until all hours of the morning.  Group projects, individual work, avoiding my roommate who would bring home unnamed (and probably untested) men for nightly sack-romping sessions and would leave me completely awkward in the morning: 

"Hi." 

"Hi."  

"So you're um...--"

"Taylor."

"Right.  Nice to meet you."

"Same here."

*silence*

"Pancakes?"

This isn't to say I haven't had any work this semester, because I have.  Granted, I don't have a job, but I've had enough school to keep me busy past the 9-5 of most stone-cold careers.  God forbid, I should be able to sleep sometimes, a fond, yet fleeting and completely unfrequent memory from last semester.

The strange thing about last night, when I was at school until the (for us, early) hour of 1:30 a.m. was that when the clock hit that midnight mark and I knew I'd be there a while longer, I felt some sense of comfort.

There were three of us in the computer lab.  I was doing my work.  One guy was looking at porn, and the other was playing some online arcade game, Bloons or something.  I felt there was a sense of community.  Or maybe I just felt serene.  It's like I was a world-class horse jockey and I'd been off the saddle for a good ten years.  Like a gymnast, getting back up o the rings after three years of being denied access for anabolic steroid-use reasons.  As if I were Britney Spears, getting back up the nerve, the songs, and the sanity to perform one last time at the VMAs (though not quite so horrendous, I hope... maybe that wasn't the best simile).  

Despite this feeling, I rather enjoy being in my own bed by 1:30 a.m.  It's nice to know you're productive and one of a collective of freaks staying at school until all hours of the morning, but it's also nice to cook dinner at home, talk to some friends on the phone, and maybe even *gasp* be in bed by midnight.

haiku...

spent the night at school

canadian invasion

long weekend ahead